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    October 07

    我出生了,但

          黑白无声,彻底击溃我的底线。老张似乎看出了些什么,就看这个吧!小津的。
       坠到谷底,我看着天花板,泪水哗哗的,那些大人物小角色,早上打的电话。他们的成功学和理想之路,儿子丈夫父亲,从那台海鸥相机开始。我们争吵写信,一起在院子里晒太阳。他放下了手中的皮带,告诉我不在是个孩子了,晚上我们却因为一块鱼肉吵了起来,最后我俩都为这鱼肉逗乐了,至于吗,一块肉。
       我做过许多的傻事,说过许多不着边际的大话。他是多么希望那些我能做到,哪怕是一条。甚至觉的在他眼里我不如别人,居然还能这么想。他总是过着自己的生活,看不起那些装腔作势的官员,讨厌那些卑鄙的小人,做自己喜欢的东西,大到玻璃房子,小到一盏台灯。不管发生什么,都冷静到近乎残酷。
      不知是想摆脱还是模仿,我把结果都强加给他,为自己开脱,恨他,其实就是讨厌自己。当他告诉我那些小子的街舞跳的不好时,你有没有苦练基本功明眼人都能看出来。他劝我要抱着玩的心态打球,那是我根本没有受伤,这不正常,要玩的好的话。
         于是,游泳乒乓等等,他根本都没兴趣教,你还是不想玩,要不早会了。
      有看不完的好电影。他看见床上放着《教父》一二三,而我要一口气全看完。我希望他健康快乐,首先我要健康快乐。
        

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